Overcome Discouragement and Disappointmentby Janice Melvin on 05/07/12
Fellow light travelers,
When you are tempted to become discouraged to your efforts toward greater prosperity, remind yourself that to think according to the general beliefs of the human race is easy -- and useless. But to think prosperity in spite of the appearances to the contrary is worth every effort, because it produces rich results. Remember the majority is always wrong.
We are living day to day with these ongoing struggles about our prosperity. I know how challenging that is to think in the contrary, to stop the worry. How many times are we reminded by others, family, friends, news and media at every turn that we are in lack. It is so challenging and difficult to change our thoughts. But changing our thoughts and feelings about our prosperity even when we feel we have none is what we must do to change the outcome.
You might think I can easily do this, and in a lot of ways I do, I have been practicing for years, however, I was challenged recently as the full moon was in scorpio, highly intense and quite emotional for me. I am a part-time caregiver for my 87 year old mom, this not a responsibility that I take lightly, it is very challenging to be a elderly caregiver. I do much better helping people in my business. My relationship with my mom is one that is a life long lesson that is my greatest teacher of the light and love for my path and purpose of teaching others about how to heal our relationships. I have to pull out my famous sacred contract and clearing energy tools I teach and use them all the time. That is why I am so good at helping others. A wounded healer and I don't hide the fact I have human experiences that are very painful for me and how I have worked through and healed them.
Mom moved closer to me after my dad passed away, its been about 3 years now. I was a daddy's girl, the baby of four girls, but dad was the gentle loving, funny and support to showing me and my sisters how to be independent and strong with faith. Mom has her great qualities too but right not I am not being very focused on those..LOL. just not part of this story today. :( Mom was very dependent on him, not that she couldn't do it herself, she admitted that was the way she wanted to do it. That was her belief and she was not going to change it. Stubborn as a mule you might say, "mantra" in her own head. I saw how my father wanted her to step up and be more independent or even interdependent in order to help him as he was declining in his health. But she would have none of it and should will tell you honestly she is not a caregiver, she doesn't want to take care of anyone. But she wants to be taken care of. Where did I get my caregiving characteristics, probably my father. But moving forward quickly on this long story to get to the point... I had Mom move to be closer to me, because none of us could take care of her while she lived in our old hometown. She was not helping herself, so I found a wonderful, affordable and beautiful senior complex in my place of paradise. Mom came with all the kinds of unrealistic expectations of how this was going to be with her living here and one of those was I would be catering to her every need,.
When she got here 3 years ago, her health was not great, she was grieving terrible for my father and wanted to jump into a new relationship to fill the gap. Until the relationship she wanted me to be that gap, it was a long process for me to wean her off of that notion, starting with my ability for setting boundaries, being honest and upfront with her, that I was stress out trying to take care of my own needs, take care of hers, be respectful and run a fulltime business. Well, it did not go well, my own health was failing fast, I was angry with her, she was angry with me, my sisters were angry, we were grieving our father, my mom her husband.. OMG, what a mess of discouragement and disappoinment at every turn. I ask for guidanee every moment of the day, how am I to take care of my own needs while I have this burden, this responsibility? No one in the family thought I needed financial assistance. Or let me put it this way, I felt like this pattern in me was I was not deserving of the help. I was not deserving to receive prosperity for my time. Well you get the picture, my outside world was showing me what I was feeling every step of the way.
I realized that the universe was helping Mom and I healing some deeply rooted ancestry and parental imprints with this experience, maybe even past lifetimes. There was a whole lot of judgement going on in the name of God's favor, that I can recall.
Mom would pay me a little bit to help her, but mostly I could not depend on that, my sisters thought I should be doing it for free, and lets not forget my business is suffering since I have not time for it to grow and my mom had many demands. Everyday mom would call me like checkin guard, to ask what I was doing and how many clients I did or didn't have. It was stressful to say the least, I was work on prosperity consciousness in the midst of a prison is what it felt like. I needed freedom and one day while using my meditations I realized I need to uncord, detach from my roots the entangle mess of energy cords as a family so connected to. But I figure, okay, this is what I need to get through these old learned rooted ancestry patterns I had.
My guidance was to use my energy tools when I need to set boundaries, send back her energy to her about the expectations she had about me and my life with her all the things I teach my clients and students in clases and workshops. Everyday, I struggled with prosperity and she would remind me about how poor I was, how I just never really made it, how she disapproved about what I do, and telling me to get a real job and then opposite of me spending more time with her, making demands and telling me how to run my business. You get the picture, it was crazy making at its finest and I was stressed out big time.
Okay, so now you probably get the picture that we have this challenging relationship, and even though I take care of her, fast forward to the present, she is healthy and happier than I have seen her in my lifetime. My sisters want to be around her now because she has become more pleasant as she is more independent and learning many new ways of doing things.
But recently she had visitors from our hometown, they are failing in health and at the senior community she deals with this all the time too, and the energetic changes of 2012 she was getting into fear, she was grieving and feeling very vulnerable. She got a cold and it immediately went to her heart chakra in the form of a respiratory illness.
I was in the process of making many transitions in my life last month, and at the same time. I was not seeing her or doing things for her like before. I couldn't, I had no time and lots of other priorities. Its a pattern too that other peoples time was more valuable than mine in her eyes, it doesn't matter I had clients, she should always come first and she can't ask her retired friends cause they are so busy. phew! .
Now comes the best part of overcoming my own discouragement and disappointment lashes out at me, she plays games of passive agressive with me. I had asked my friends to pray for her send her healing energy. Well, they helped her alright she was feeling better, and I was the issues of what was on her chest I guess. She was not holding back, letting me know that I was not there for her and keep using the words, quote "we just need to clear the air". I said is that your air or everyone's air. She says, "my air". Regarding prosperity issues she always likes to return to in the past. .. And if you know anything about metaphysics, which I do, I knew she has emotions of grief and upset in her heart because the body does not just get sick, its always an emotional and mental reason.
Well, I was already emotional myself for my own life is very busy running a business, making lots of changes, and in the month of April I made two big moves. A new home and a new office location, I made the changes all within a week. I was feeling my own emotions, fatigue as my body needed to process all the changes, I knew I needed to get my rest, set boundaries with her and take care of my own needs and do what I could do for her. I asked for what I need from her, which was to ask for help from others, so I could get some help. Ask her friends to take her to the Doctor appointment, because I could not cancel my clients or she would have to wait till I was free to take her in the afternoon. She wanted me to sit with her at the apartment, one of friends came down to do that and pick up her persciption. I came over in the evening made her dinner, gave her medication, then ran back to my office in time for another client to see. The next day, made her a crockpot of soup. She had someone their cleaning who could help as well. I call upon my angels to help me and they do. Mom responds very quickly when I ask the angels to help me with her.
So, you have to laugh, well I did after I had a good cry, she calls to tell me how terrible I am, how I can't do anything right, and a number of other things that says my sisters are upset with me too and that I take advantage of her, followed with "now dont think of herself as a victim" when I expressed my hurt as I start to cry. Crazy making, but I have been overcoming this discouragement and disappointment inside of me now for a lifetime of these same conversations filled with manipulations and I feel abusive contrary behaviors.
Where does this go with prosperity, when I experience discouragement and dissappoinment, I use my energy tools to disconnect, I seek psyhically how I have attached outside of myself that others hold power over me, that is the furthest of the truth of our beings. We allow that to happen and as quickly we can bring that power back to ourself and set those who take it free to work on their own issues. I will also call healer friends when I may need a more objective guidance to the situation.
I alllow the universe to show me a blessed solution for an alternative out of thinking in terms of the negative and move more into the positivie expectations and also I will remove any life lesson patterns and blockage that are coming to the surface for healing. Forgiveness is huge. Its not always easy, but i start with forgiving myself first, for I am the power from within out, that is our Divine Essence.
I share the stories of my personal life with a few friends, they often call me a saint on how I still loving make my mom her soup, I am respectful, even when I trully want nothing to do with her sometimes. I must do what my own internal prosperity says is right and that is to be true to myself. Even when it feels like you will never receive what you are asking for, that is when you need to stay firm that it is on its way, its coming to you now and don't let anyone block you. Open yourself up to receive it. Noone can block it, unless you allow it. Something better is on the way and in the most delightful way too and it will appear at the right time. It will. I know, I receive it all the time.
Take the time to ask yourself, Am I allowing myself to receive my good? If that answer is no, then start allowing yourself to receive the good, to manifest your dreams and desires. ALLOW, It may come in a different form that you expected, so be grateful all along the way, let go of the way it will show up, be adventurous in taking guided action steps, and it will come. Appreciate it all, the good, the bad, the ugly.
Its has taken me years, I have finally allowed myself to receive and I think 2012 energy is helping me to clear out those old rooted patterns I had been clearing for decades. Ancestry roots of critisicism, lack, feart etc.clearing. I am not my mother. and so whatever she says to me may hurt for a while, or maybe I seem like I have failed so many times, I remind myself that I need to expand my viewpoint and positive expectations. Most seeming failures are just installments toward victory, or are they really failing to mis the mark of the target, we learn and we grow through the experience.
So if you need money, prosperity, wealth, abundance, know that even if it feels like there is no way out, it is on its way, this too shall pass, God and the angels are always there for you. I have been saying the Lords' prayer and the 23 psalms.. my cup runneth over, or the Lord is my shepard I shall not want. These two Christian prayers, I learned the metaphysical and positive aspects like magic keys to shift my energy to release and surrender to the higher power within me and all around me. May you be blessed on this beautiful day in May too.
Blessings of prosperity coming your way today.